Excerpts from: Ashley Matos, Pajtesa Rexhepi, Solansh Moya
COMMENT:
Which of these three samples is closer to your writing style?
Are you happy with the way you write? Or do you wish you wrote more like one of these three samples? Which one in particular?
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There’s
a picture at 1:37/4:46 in “The Way They Lived” that really caught my attention,
where the man is laying on a bed made out of a couple of boards and two
barrels, looking into the camera with a deep sadness. The picture made me stop
and wonder, “Why would anyone have wanted to document this? Don’t just take
pictures of how miserable they are, they know how they feel and look. They
don’t need the permanent reminder.” As a journalist, that’s one thing we’re
forced to do. We go into areas where people are at their worst, begging for
help in some cases, and we take pictures and write stories about their
suffering for our own gain. We’re unable to help, lest we become biased or
tarnish the results of our research. It’s an atrocious practice, yet we do
nothing to change it.
I felt my chest tighten at the line, “Dear
mother, what is money when you long for your home” in “Lacrime Napoletane.” I
identify with this line, because I’m either working or in class until 8 p.m.
every day. The idea of wishing to be home, but knowing you have to do work for
a better future is a painful internal struggle that the songs reminded me of,
but in a new context. The songs made me remember when I left home for a country
I’d never been to, and the feelings of loneliness and fear as I tried to start
my life over. I can’t even begin to imagine how much more painful the
experience would have been if it was actually hard to communicate with my loved
ones here, or if I was potentially unable to ever return.
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As I watched the pictures in the
short video “The way They Lived” I wondered how a human being can be so strong
to swallow all that misery. I was driven to despair by their eyes and the way
they looked, so tired, yet that was just a “click” of their lifetime, just one
image of their everyday reality.
When I read the book “Son of Italy”
I thought I was able to visualize Pascal’s tragic experiences. However, I was
aware that those were images created by me as I read his words. These pictures
in the contrary bring the actual victims to my eyes and I can’t escape that
reality. In them I saw the children, the mothers and the way they had to live,
with sleeping beds made of thin tatters over the floor. Everything I saw and
read so far is in a way stamped by these pictures, they are the ultimate proof
of that tragedy lived by so many immigrants.
In the song “Lacrime Napoletane”, same as in “Santa Lucia Luntana”, there are parts of lyrics that bring the same question, if money is worth so much pain and sorrow? “Yes I have a few dollars, but I’ve never felt like such a miserable bum”. When one is away from home, money has no value. The time doesn’t reduce the lamentation for home, nor do a few dollars more especially if earning them costed ones honor.
In the song “Lacrime Napoletane”, same as in “Santa Lucia Luntana”, there are parts of lyrics that bring the same question, if money is worth so much pain and sorrow? “Yes I have a few dollars, but I’ve never felt like such a miserable bum”. When one is away from home, money has no value. The time doesn’t reduce the lamentation for home, nor do a few dollars more especially if earning them costed ones honor.
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Through these pictures you can see how hard the
immigrant experience was, from the difficult journey to America to the living
conditions they had to endure. However, I admire their sacrifice. They were
willing to endure hard circumstances in order to obtain the American dream.
Pascal D’Angelo said, in his autobiography, “Without realizing it, I had
learned the great lesson of America: I had learned to have faith in the
future" (pg. 156). Faith, in sadness, is something that is depicted in
these text. They feel alone and sad; they wish to go back home, but they can’t.
They believe if they continue working hard they’ll give their families a better
life, even if theirs is in despair. The
future is bright if you work hard and never give up. These text were more
explicit than Son of Italy because we
don’t see a resolution in them. We don’t know what happened to the immigrants
in the end. Did they come into some luck? Did their American dream come true?
We see a heartfelt ending in Pascal’s story. He endured a hard life, but in the
end his dream came true. His hard work payed off. Not everyone is that lucky.
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I believe I write most like the third writer. I feel this way because the third excerpt to me seems personal and asks questions to the reader, like I do in most of my writing. All three excerpts are very well written and really show what each writer is truly feeling.
ReplyDeleteMy style of writing feels closest to the second passage. I put a lot of my own feeling and emotion into my writing, or at least I try my best to do so and hope that the message I'm trying to convey comes across. I am happy with the way I write, but there's always room for improvement and I am constantly trying to become more descriptive so that my readers can visualize what I'm talking about.
ReplyDeleteThe first one feels like my style of writing because it's more honest and i always have to write the first thing that comes to my mind without really feeling a need to look back at it. The first thoughts are always your honest ones. I'm not entirely happy with the way i write since i can show more expression through my drawings rather than words but i wish to always improve in that writing field.
ReplyDeleteI feel I write like the third passage but I am not happy with the way I write because I sometimes have trouble with a way of words and I feel I could improve it somehow. I do wish i could write like the first passage which expresses the writers true feelings.
ReplyDeleteI find myself writing like that of the second passage. Moreover, I feel that I can connect with the author of the second passage. The use of words and the defined description ad relations between text and reader was noticed. I feel as though my thoughts are conjured in such a way, but when it comes to placing it on paper, it is far more complex than it needs to be.
ReplyDeleteThe second writer to me is the best one because this is the way I write. I don't really paraphrase or cite and sometimes I don't get a certain feeling when reading something, and sometimes I just explain how it is. It resonates with me and how I would write.
ReplyDeleteI feel like my writing style is the most similar to the first one because it feels like the author is writing about their first emotions that they felt. I find myself writing with the first emotions I feel a lot, but I would prefer to have the more refined and thought out writing style of person 3.
ReplyDeleteThe third writing style is the one that feels similar to the style I strive to achieve. The sentences are well structured and the through line of the passage is clear and concise. Also, the use of giving the reader questions is a good way to keep the reader engaged and involved with the writing.
ReplyDeleteWhile I thought all the entries were great, I could relate more to the third excerpt, as far as writing style. I believe that the writer was able to provide a writing style that was different than the other two. I found it more relatable. The writer also a quote from the reading which I enjoyed. I often do the same in my writing. I like to give an example so that the reader can see how I understood the quote, and what I analyzed.
ReplyDeleteThe 1st sample is closest to my style because the writer was able to incorporate her personal thoughts, connections, and emotions into the assignment. She took it a step beyond just describing the images that were in the short, she was able to talk about the pain that she saw in the faces of the people.
ReplyDeleteI'm happy with the way that I write because I manage to describe/ analyze the context of the assignment while incorporating my own interpretation. However, I don't dive in too deep into the emotional aspect when I write because it's easy to drift off of the topic when you start discussing your personal feelings about the subject. It's always best to find that happy medium, where you're writing just enough.
My writing style is more close to number 3. The person who wrote it, uses small and precise sentences. Overall, my writing skills are not good, but at some point I am happy with that. I have a lot of trouble in terms of structuring my papers. But the real nightmare starts, when I can’t summaries my thoughts. This is kind of strange, but there is a huge gap between my mind and my writings. Lastly, I am an international student, English is not my native language and this adds another barrier to my writing skills. I want to testify that I am a bad writer, when I write in my own language too.
ReplyDeleteI am happy with the style I use when I write assignments. I think it is a similar style to the first paragraph posted above. It is easy to read and it feels like you are having a conversation. It doesn't seem too professional but yet it's still written nicely. It makes the writing feel more real to the reader.
ReplyDelete